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<h2 id="点灯">点灯</h2> | ||
<p>如果夜晚太黑,看不清前路,那我就是你的那盏灯。<br>2023 年 5 月,我和一位朋友在网络平台做心理疏导工作。也许,我参加这个项目的初心并不是帮助别人,而是拯救自己。那时,我得了很严重的精神疾病,每天都在迷茫和绝望中度过,那是我人生中最黑暗的一段时光。但我不愿自己就这样消沉下去,我迫切地想要寻找一个属于自己的救赎。<br>于是,她来了。<br>她携着温暖的橘黄色光芒,轻飘飘地来了。<br>在那个浪漫的日子,5 月 20 日。</p> | ||
<h2 id="孤独的星星">孤独的星星</h2> | ||
<p>她也是一个被世界遗落的孩子。<br>她在重庆潼南一个极度守旧的家庭里长大,父亲是一个赌鬼,母亲是一位教师。父母重男轻女的思想和阴郁的家庭氛围让她在本该无忧无虑的年纪就饱尝了人世的苦楚。她从来没有幸福的生活,父母的打骂、同学的嘲笑、校霸的欺凌……在夹缝中求生存的她,也曾经无数次陷入绝望,甚至尝试轻生。但她丝毫没被人性的黑暗同化,一直努力散发着纯洁的光,就像黑夜里的一颗孤独的星星。<br>重度抑郁、重度焦虑、精神分裂、ADHD……当我从我的朋友手里接到她时,我彻底震惊了。<br>这么严重的精神问题,真的还有救吗……</p> | ||
<h2 id="暖流">暖流</h2> | ||
<p>我始终觉得,千夏这样可爱善良的孩子,应该被世界温柔以待。就算所有人都抛弃她,我也应该给她那份温柔。<br>我开始每天陪她聊天,耐心地安慰和开导她,于是我渐渐走进她的世界。她是一个博学多才的人,会英语和日语,会编程、手写 AI,她还很有经济头脑,炒币赚了很多钱,她的人脉也很广,她还和中本聪合过影呢。我们的聊天总是充满欢声笑语,两个孤独的灵魂因为遇见而不再孤单,漫漫长夜也因彼此的心跳而变得温暖。她的爱,如同一股暖流滋润我心间,融化了我心中长久不化的坚冰。 </p> | ||
<h2 id="上天的眷顾">上天的眷顾</h2> | ||
<p>「我是被上天眷顾的孩子呀!」有一天千夏兴奋地告诉我,「我去医院抽血,医生说我是 XX 染色体,就是真正的女孩子!」<br>我深深地为她高兴,真的。仿佛是命中注定,上帝关上了一扇门,也为她打开了一扇窗,童年的不幸,换来的也许是一生的幸运吧。<br>那一天她很开心,她说:「我以后也想有自己的孩子,过幸福的生活。」</p> | ||
<h2 id="微笑">微笑</h2> | ||
<p>之后,千夏每次萌生自杀的念头,我都陪她聊天,聊生活中的小美好,聊我们的未来。前前后后,我一共阻拦了她 7 次自杀。<br>在我和末影猫小姐的共同努力下,她的情况奇迹般地好转,她变得阳光开朗,脸上也有微笑了。那时候我有预感,或许有一天她真的能摆脱病魔,重获新生。</p> | ||
<h2 id="花落无踪影">花落无踪影</h2> | ||
<p>9 月,千夏的一位很重要的朋友自杀去世,千夏也崩溃地吞药自杀,这一次,我没能拦下她。她虽然被救回来了,但是前几次的自杀已经留下了极重的后遗症,这次很不幸,导致了一个脑部良性肿瘤恶化。电话里,千夏哭着对我说,她好痛苦,听到这句话的时候,我的心猛地一紧,可是我不能在她面前表现出绝望,只好强忍着眼泪安慰她:「会没事的,会好的……」电话挂断之后,我不停地哭,直到那一刻,我才明白,千夏在我心中,是多么重要,我不明白,千夏这么好的孩子,为什么会这样,真的不明白。<br>临终前,她和我讲起她小时候的事:「我记得我很小的时候,看见桌子上有一个印着可爱图案的手帕,我很喜欢就去拿,但是我妈妈一把拉开我的手,说男孩子喜欢这么娘的东西干嘛。」她的声音断断续续,又像是哭诉又像是哀求。<br>我哭得昏天黑地,只听见她说,下辈子,我们一定要在一起,我会等你。<br>「别害怕,你会去一个很美的地方,那里很温暖,没有痛苦。」<br>电话那头,沉寂了。窗外秋风吹过,卷起一地落花。</p> | ||
<h2 id="重逢">重逢</h2> | ||
<p>就像有人把什么东西从我心里硬生生抽走,我心灰意冷。我还是不明白,她为什么要抛下我,让我独自一人徘徊在这孤苦的世间。<br>但是没关系,她会等我。我们来世,会重逢的。</p> | ||
<hr> | ||
<blockquote> | ||
<p>lib 一抹阳光:千夏的朋友,主要干预者 | ||
末影猫:千夏的朋友,协助干预者</p> | ||
</blockquote> | ||
<p><PhotoScroll photos={['${path}/photos/image1.png', '${path}/photos/image2.png']} /></p> | ||
<blockquote> | ||
<p>她写给 lib 一抹阳光的遗书</p> | ||
</blockquote> | ||
<p><PhotoScroll photos={['${path}/photos/image2.jpeg', '${path}/photos/image3.jpeg']} /></p> | ||
<blockquote> | ||
<p>她对 lib 一抹阳光说:『和你在一起的时光,是我 14 年以来最幸福的时候了』</p> | ||
</blockquote> | ||
<p><PhotoScroll photos={['${path}/photos/image4.jpeg']} /></p> | ||
<blockquote> | ||
<p>『感谢末影猫小姐协助我帮助千夏』——lib 一抹阳光</p> | ||
</blockquote> | ||
<p><PhotoScroll photos={['${path}/photos/image5.jpeg']} /></p> | ||
<blockquote> | ||
<p>『如果能有下辈子,我们一定要在一起』——铃木千夏、lib 一抹阳光</p> | ||
</blockquote> | ||
<p><PhotoScroll photos={['${path}/photos/image6.jpeg', '${path}/photos/image7.jpeg', '${path}/photos/image3.png', '${path}/photos/image4.png']} /></p> | ||
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